Rock ‘N’ Roll Retirement

  Watching television can tell you things about your parents that you may not have known.  The same is true about flipping through a magazine.  What you discover may surprise you when you begin paying close attention to the advertisements geared toward them and their generation.

  As baby boomers across the country reach retirement age, major American companies have been forced to rethink their marketing strategies, and redesign them to appeal to a different kind of retiree.  You have probably noticed it in the Fidelity Investments commercials, with the lava-lamp bubbles touting their 401k benefits and offering ideas for getting the most of you IRA, as Iron Butterfly’s “In-A-Gadda-DaVida” wails in the background.  The same company has also commissioned the use of Terry Jacks’ “Seasons In The Sun” for an ad, while Ameriprise Financial has hired Dennis Hopper, Mr. Easy Rider, to peddle their financial planning to former flower children.

  It feels strange to see the anthems and icons of the Sixties and Seventies being used to sell annuities and retirement planning.  But while it may seem to go against the very spirit of the music and the generation that produced it, we have to assume, on the evidence of its continued existence, that it must be working.

  Baby boomers are defined as the generation born between 1946 and 1964, conceived in the postwar reunions of soldiers returning home from World War II and Korea to their wives.  As a generation, they are known as free spirits—the children of the Sixties and Seventies who questioned authority, fought for civil rights, protested the war in Vietnam, and brought about the sexual revolution.  Of course these are generalizations, but they are strong ones, and are not without merit.  They have been used to characterize baby boomers since the McGovern campaign and, for better or worse, will live on as the legacy of their generation.

  It’s no mystery why advertisers are trying to get into the wallets of America’s largest demographic.  They are also the richest.  Historically, the 18-49 age group has been the sweet spot, if you will—the group with the largest disposable income.  But now, the nation’s 75 million baby boomers hold reign as the country’s most affluent segment.  They hold more than 75% of the country’s financial assets, and have an estimated $1 trillion of disposable income annually.  In essence, their spending power is simply too powerful for advertisers to ignore.

  Until recently, only about 10 percent of advertising dollars were spent on ads targeting the over-50 group.  And while that is starting to climb a little, it still isn’t anywhere near the levels that would be proportionate to the baby boomers’ spending power.

  The perception among advertisers is that boomers will redefine retirement.  Boomers will not go gently into their golden years; they will be more active, more adventurous, more independent, and generally just younger than previous generations of retirement age.

  Which means you can expect to see more Centrum commercials blaring Pink Floyd, more Cadillac ads rocking the Stones, and McCartney selling off his share of the Beatles’ catalog to be used in Titleist commercials.  Oh, and when that time comes, be on the lookout for more Rock and Roll retirement communities.  Mark my words.

-From Pulse
   March 29, 2007

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Egg-Vertising

  I must confess: when I first heard about CBS’ new plan to market their upcoming fall season late last week, I was appalled.  I thought, “Is no surface off limits?  Is nothing sacred?  We already plaster advertisements over every square inch of Major League sports venues, from the urinals to the seatbacks, and then sell the naming rights to the stadium itself. What’s next?”

  As the fall season approaches, CBS has secured a deal with an upstart company out of Boulder, CO, that will enable their wide-eyed logo to greet you first thing every morning.  The new company is called EggFusion, which uses a laser to etch “micro-thin grooves” into the egg’s shell, and it will begin printing ads for the network’s fall lineup on eggs, coming soon to a grocer near you.

  The messages are as cheesy as the medium is innovative, with ads for their Monday night comedy lineup reading “Leave the Yolks to Us,” “Funny Side Up,” and “Shelling Out Laughs.”  Ads for “The Amazing Race” read “Scramble To Win On CBS.”  So someday, and that day may be nearer than you think, you may turn to your waiter and say, “Excuse me, uh, sir. I just found a bad joke in my soufflé.”

  As I began looking into this new company, this EggFusion, it slowly started to make sense.  Also printed on each egg will be a traceable batch number that lets you know where the egg came from and when it was processed, as well as an expiration date.  (Apparently there are certain health risks associated with eating eggs beyond their expiration date.  That’s one lesson that bachelorhood never taught me.)  The revenue generated from pimping out egg-space will defray the cost of printing this useful information on the eggs.

  As far as ad campaigns go, CBS may be onto something.  EggFusion puts the message into the hands of their target demographic—most egg buyers are middle-class mothers, aged 22-54—early in the morning, while they’re planning their day.  It won’t be long before other advertisers realize that eggs are typically used in the kitchen, which, as EggFusion is quick to point out, “doubles as the central hub for families.  This is where shopping lists are formed, cookies are baked, daily planning occurs and many decisions are made.”

  I should also point out that a percentage of egg-space will also be devoted to charitable organizations.  I’ve seen sample eggs that plug Habitat For Humanity, for example.

  To egg-splore this egg-citing new world of “Egg-vertising”—their term, not mine—check out www.eggfusion.com.  You may also log-on to www.myfreshegg.com, to learn more about expiration dates and those traceable batch numbers.

 -From Pulse
    July 27, 2006

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Marketing’s 6th Sense

  The apocalypse is upon us. And what would the apocalypse be without a new Slayer tour, or a new book from red-state spokesmodel Ann Coulter, to mark the occasion?

  This June 6th marks the centennial apocalypse scare: 6/6/06. According to the New Testament’s Book of Revelations, the number 666 is the mark of the beast, or the antichrist. “Let him that hath understanding count the number of the beast: for it is the number of a man; and his number is 666.” Those with a proclivity for doomsday theories have begun to speculate that Evil will be unleashed upon the earth this June 6th. And that may not be much of a stretch.

  Marketing minds across the nation are searching frantically for ways to capitalize on this potential goldmine. Marketing is all about shticks and gimmicks, and this serendipitous date seems to be providing them one. And the fact that June 6th falls on a Tuesday—the day that books, CDs and videos are released—makes the temptation to capitalize simply irresistible.

  Among those cashing in on this Julian phenomenon is 20th Century Fox. The movie house will release its remake of the 1976 horror flick “The Omen” on June 6th, and has been creating quite a scene with its promotional efforts. About a month ago, the company hired airplanes to fly over popular spring break destinations, with banners in tow reading “You have been warned.” Not a smart idea in post-9/11 America. Emergency dispatchers were flooded with calls, and one plane over Panama City, Florida was escorted out of the sky by a fighter jet. (“You have been warned” was part of the tagline from the original “Omen.”)

  “People have different reactions when they hear 666,” says Jeffrey Godsick, executive vice president of marketing for 20th Century Fox, in a recent interview with the L.A. Times. “It’s partly superstition, partly fear, partly reality; maybe it’s a little cultural. These numbers seem to have a significant impact.” Fox hopes to bank on that reaction with a huge opening day.
Crown Forum publishers will also be milking the 6/6/06 cash cow with the release of “Godless,” the new book by ultra-conservative talking head Ann Coulter. No, it’s not an autobiography. In fact, she recently told Neil Cavuto of Fox News that the release date was her “little tribute to liberals.”

  Also slated for June 6th is a new tour from the legendary metal band Slayer. Their “Unholy Alliance Tour—Preaching To The Perverted” kicks off that night in San Diego.

  Not since 9/11 has a date come along with such marketing potential. Never mind the recently discovered evidence that 666 is NOT the mark of the beast. It’s true; in 1895, a piece the oldest existing copy of the Book of Revelation was uncovered in an ancient landfill in Oxyrhynchus, Egypt. The fragment of text, written in Greek on papyrus, was badly discolored and damaged but pre-existed the oldest known copy of Revelation by at least 100 years. The condition of the paper made it illegible, but scholars at Oxford University were recently able to read it using new advanced imaging techniques. The results were clear: “his number is 616,” not 666.

-From Pulse
   April 27, 2006

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